On Anger

 

Rev Dr Mark Porizky

 

 

8/6/06

 

 

Ephesians 4:17-5:2  

 


 

Now this I affirm and insist on in the Lord: you must no longer live as the Gentiles live, in the futility of their minds.  They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of their ignorance and hardness of heart.  They have lost all sensitivity and have abandoned themselves to licentiousness, greedy to practice every kind of impurity.  That is not the way you learned Christ!  For surely you have heard about him and were taught in him, as truth is in Jesus.  You were taught to put away your former way of life, your old self, corrupt and deluded by its lusts, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to clothe yourselves with the new self, created according to the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.

 

So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are members of one another.  Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil.  Thieves must give up stealing; rather let them labor and work honestly with their own hands, so as to have something to share with the needy.  Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with which you were marked with a seal for the day of redemption.  Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.  Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and live in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

 

      It is strange that at a time when tolerance is the catch word of the day, rage is the emotion of choice. In the last few years road rage makes the news as angry motorists have exchanged the hand gesture for the hand gun. Social commentators are referring to today's era as "the age of rage." The Michael Douglas film a few years back, Falling Down portrays the everyday man who has had enough with society gone mad by responding to the injustices of life with unmitigated rage. Throughout the movie you find yourself cheering his righting the wrongs of injustice, but soon realize that his anger is the problem, not the solution for society.

 


      This problem of rage can be seen in the example of Eugene Schneider of Carteret , New Jersey , as anger took control after a divorce court ordered him to divide his property equally with his wife. He got mad, took a chainsaw and cut the couple's $350,000 home in half.  

 

      One may become angry at painful circumstances resulting in a desire for revenge.

 

      Pamela Wiser was mad at the ex-boyfriend who infected her with the AIDS virus. So she decided to get even by passing on HIV to every man she could find. She spent a year picking up men at bars in rural Tennessee . At first she bragged of flings with up to 50 men. "I was just getting revenge for what he did to me," the 29-year-old divorcee and mother of two said. (World, Aug 22, 1998)

 

      Anger can often affect those outside the scope of our frustration.

 

      Take for instance what happened in the spring of 1894, when the Baltimore Orioles came to Boston to play a routine baseball game. But what happened that day was anything but routine. The Orioles’ John McGraw got into a fight with the Boston third baseman. Within minutes all the players from both teams had joined in the brawl.

 

      The warfare quickly spread to the grandstands. Among the fans the conflict went from bad to worse. Someone set fire to the stands and the entire ballpark burned to the ground. Not only that, but the fire spread to 107 other Boston buildings as well.

 

      Anger has been defined as "that strong feeling of displeasure and hostility resulting from injury, mistreatment, or opposition."  Yet so many of us deny its stronghold in our lives, using sophisticated language to deflect having to wrestle with our rage. We may call it frustration or depression; we may say we are tense or just under a lot of pressure.  We may excuse our anger by saying that we blow up but we get over it quickly. But like a hand-grenade, the explosion may be quick, but the degree of destruction is tremendous.

 

      What is the place of anger in the Christian life? Is it wrong to be angry? What should be our response to our anger? Why should we concern ourselves with this very common response?

26. "Be angry but do not sin; Do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil.”  

      Are you surprised by this? In fact, there is a command here to be angry.  "Be angry and do not sin." There is an assumption here that there is a place for anger. Too often in running from sin we embrace another sin. A pietistic response to anger is to imagine that any ire is inherently sinful. But Paul assumes that there will be times when anger is a proper response.

 

      The great preacher Henry Beecher once said, "A man who does not know how to be angry, does not know how to be good. A man who does not feel indignation over evil is either a fungus or a wicked man." There are times when we see evil when anger should be the assumed response. Having just prescribed truth in the place of falsehood, Paul is clear that when the truth is spoken in situations where falsehood reigns, anger may well be evidenced.

 

      Think to a time when you got angry. What was behind that anger?

 

      No doubt you were frustrated at not attaining something you thought was rightfully yours. It may be hard to see anger as a problem, because you may have been legitimate in your frustration. Your rights may well have been violated, your reputation may well have been harmed. But the problem of anger is that now you want someone to pay for your inconvenience. You want them to hurt.... oh, not bleed necessarily, but squirm a bit.

 

      When you don’t get the raise you know you’ve deserved, when the kids don’t do what you tell them to do... what happens? You feel helpless, frustrated and, yes, angry. Your goals have not been met and now others need to know they have not toed the line properly.

  

      We often think of anger as an explosion, but there are forms of anger:

 

      Venting is the most common picture we have of anger. We may just want to let off a little steam, but we often get ourselves into more hot water. If you are a "ventor" you know the routine:

 

      Respiration deepens; the heart beats more rapidly; the arterial pressure rises; the blood is shifted from the stomach and intestines to the heart, central nervous system, and the muscles; sugar is freed from the reserves in the liver; the spleen contracts and discharges its contents of concentrated corpuscles, and adrenaline is secreted. Mt. St. Helen ’s has nothing on you!

 

      You may excuse your rage by saying: "At least I don’t hold it in! It’s over in a matter of moments."

 

      Recently a study done by Iowa State University discovered something which the Bible has taught all along. Venting anger, yelling and screaming when you are frustrated, hitting your spouse with a foam rubber club when you are upset, or going out and playing paintball with someone you are mad at, are not emotionally healthy things to do, even though some psychologists have been encouraging people to do this for years.

 

      The study found that people who vent their anger tend to become more aggressive in their behavior. As Proverbs 29:11 reminds us: "The fool gives full vent to his anger; but a wise man keeps himself under control."

 

      For the quiet sorts among us, you may sit there with smug expressions of righteousness because you don’t vent. But do you internalize the anger? There may not be an explosion, but there is a slow burn over time. While anger turned outward leads to aggression, anger turned inward leads to depression. As one sage once commented: "Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm." Rather than pouring forth wrath toward a person or object which has kept us from our objectives, we turn that rage inside and consume ourselves.

 

      How should we handle anger? If we should neither vent nor clam up, what should we do?

 

      Paul gives great advice: anger, no matter what its source or form, is to be short lived. Even godly anger will go sour if it sits too long. It is to be set aside at the end of the day. We don't have the luxury of dealing with it later. What Paul says here is often understood to mean don’t go to bed angry. But for some of us that may mean no sleep for days! But this reminds us that anger, for all its possible legitimacy, is a dangerous emotion and should not be nurtured into a grudge. Anger is the moral equivalent of biological adrenaline. It is good and healthy to experience periodic secretions of adrenaline in reaction to dangerous situations. But a steady flow would damage the heart. So with anger. It has damaged many hearts because it was not put away, but nurtured again and again into a life-destroying grudge.

 

      Consider Paul’s advice a metaphor rather than a literal command.  We are not God.  We need to sleep sometimes with unresolved angers.  But too many days spent that way will make anger an ally…and give the devil a foothold on your life.  We must repent of the self-righteousness that always justifies our anger, our hurt, and our pain.  

 

      Thus Paul concludes by warning of a possible side effect of anger which we may not fully realize. What happens when we become angry, but do not quickly move on? What happens when we harbor anger, then we revel in our rage, when we relive and re-ignite our ire and pour gas on our fury, we open the door to many more problems in our life? To do so, Paul says, is to make room for the devil.  The phrase means to give sin a "possibility" or "opportunity."  

 

      Anger divides. As you lie in bed and your mind rehashes all the justifiable reasons for your anger, you only create more and more division. Paul’s concern in Ephesians 4 is for the unity of the church. Your anger can quickly destroy that bond of peace.

 

      How can we conquer anger?

 

      The answer comes in verses 31-32. Anger is put away at the foot of the Cross. Where our sinful nature was put off, where the righteousness of Christ was put on, that is where our minds must be renewed. Rather than anger, forgiveness must control our thinking. We forgive in light of the forgiveness secured for us by Christ.  

 

      In our relationships with others, often what passes for love is little more than a neat business transaction. People are kind to us, so we repay them with equal consideration. When they treat us unjustly, our negative response is really what they asked for. Everything is so balanced, so fair, so logical with this eye-for-an-eye and tooth-for-a-tooth kind of justice. But Christian love never settles for only what's reasonable. It insists on giving mercy as well as justice. It breaks the chain of logical reactions.

 

      General Robert E. Lee was once asked what he thought of a fellow officer in the Confederate Army who had made some derogatory remarks about him. Lee rated him as being very satisfactory. The person who asked the question seemed perplexed. "General," he said, "I guess you don't know what he's been saying about you." "I know," answered Lee. "But I was asked my opinion of him, not his opinion of me!"

 

      Be angry but do not sin.  Do not let the sun go down on your anger, lest you make room for the devil.

 

      Only those who know the love of God and the forgiveness of Jesus Christ for their sin will find this within their reach.

 

      Will you pray with me now?

 

 

 


St. Andrew Presbyterian Church, Groton , CT

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